HOW TO TEACH YOUR KIDS TO FIND GOOD FRIENDS AT SCHOOL
It's no secret that kids need friends. Friends help them build self-esteem, learn social skills and gain a solid support system. But not all friends are created equal! As a call center Dad, my usual stress is IF my kids will be able to find the right friends.
The right ones can make life much more enjoyable, while the wrong ones may cause stress or even serious problems down the road. So how do you know if someone is right for your child? The key is in finding people who share similar values and goals about relationships. Here are some tips that may help your kids find good friends at school.
I teach my son to...
Look for other kids that will make them happy.
When you're looking for a new friend, it's important to look for other kids who will make them happy. They want to be around other kids who are genuinely happy in their own skin, because that makes everyone around them feel good about themselves and about their lives too.
If the person doesn't make you feel good when you're with him or her, then it's not going to work out as a friend. Consider what your friends say and do when they're with you: Do they bring happiness into your life? If so, then they're good ones! The same goes if the person brings sadness or frustration into your life—you don't want those kinds of things in your life either.
Look for other kids who respect you.
Respect is important in any relationship, whether it’s with a friend or family member. It means treating the people around you with kindness and care, listening to what they have to say, and respecting their ideas. Of course as parents, we should be the first people to emulate respect. As a call center dad blogger, I always make it a point to talk about things where parents should respect their kids.
Teach our kids that it can be hard to know whether someone else is respecting them or not. But there are some signs that their friends will treat them well:
- They listen when you talk about things that matter to you.
- They don't laugh at or make fun of your opinions (unless they're funny).
- They don't make jokes at your expense—and if they do, they apologize right away.
- Look for people who like you for who you are, not what you can do for them.
Respect is earned, not given. This is a lesson that kids need to learn early on in life, and it's one we as adults should keep in mind as well.
A lot of people expect to be treated with respect just because they are friends with someone else. But friendship is a two-way street and cannot be taken for granted or abused by one person without consequences; if someone doesn't respect you, then you shouldn't respect them either!
If someone is always taking advantage of you and never giving back anything (even small things like getting your toys), then there's probably something wrong with their values—and they may not be the best friend for you after all! The most important thing to remember here is that kids don't have to hang out with everyone who wants them around all the time; there will always be someone who isn't worth their time, so it's best just not wasting theirs!
Look for kids who have a similar set of values.
It's important to find other kids who have the same values as you. Values are things that are important to you and guide your actions. They can be different from one person to another, but they should be similar within a friendship.
You might think of this as having a similar "code of ethics" or "moral compass." For example, if someone is into Buddhism and meditation, they probably have some ideas about how they want to live their life that are very different from someone who is into skateboarding or surfing. That doesn't mean either person would be bad friends with one another; it just means that their philosophies may not line up perfectly on every issue (which can make for some interesting conversations!).
To find friends who share your values, take note of what kinds of things people say when talking about themselves—and then listen more closely when someone says something that resonates with you! If there's something in particular that comes up often (for instance: being grateful), then maybe ask them about how they practice gratitude in their lives—and see if this is something you can share together!
Look for kids who have similar goals about relationships.
As a call center dad, I make sure that I talk with your kids about what they want in a friend. I also have to stress this as a dad blogger -- you should take time to talk to your kids.
Ask them to tell you about their best friend, and why they like having that person around. If there was no one else to play with, what would your child do? What does a good friend do for you? How can we make sure that everyone is happy and getting along?
Consider the way your child acts around others. For example, if he or she is shy or has trouble making friends, then he/she may benefit from some extra help opening up to people outside of his/her family circle.
Try finding ways for kids to connect with other kids at school or in the neighborhood who might be interested in being friends (like through after-school activities).
Having good friends can make kids happy, but it's important that kids find the right friends!
Good friends can help kids feel good about themselves and their lives. Kids also learn new things from their friends—like how to share or resolve conflicts with others—and develop trust in their abilities. This is why it's important for your child to be able to tell you what makes him happy or sad, who he feels comfortable talking with, and how he feels when he is around other people.
At the end of the day, we as parents should train our kids to choose friends wisely. This will be a skill that they are to use until they become adults. Good friends will make or break your kids future, so make sure that you guide your children properly.
Last point, always teach your kids that it will always be better to be alone than to be in bad company. Home is where they can always go to for support, guidance and unconditional love. If we show adequate security at home, then our kids will surely find good friends at school.
2 Comments
Great article. I would've taught the same values to my kids.
ReplyDeleteIts good to read this kind of article especialy for my elaisha who is need to find good friends talaga!
ReplyDelete- Daddy Clavy